Me, Myself and I

I swear sometimes I have multiple personalities.  There are days where I experience inexpressible joy and deep gratitude - I feel hopeful.  Then there are days where I feel like I've never experienced anything but sadness and grief - I feel hopeless.  And unfortunately these emotions seem to be tied very closely to my current circumstances.

You'd think after 40 years, 34 years spent as a born-again Christian (with all the Biblical training that comes with that), that I would be beyond riding the roller coaster of my day to day emotions.  Why can't I seem to transfer all of that head knowledge of the Bible into a heart knowledge?

Please God, help me "get" your Word.  Understand it.  Apply it.  Live it.  I'm so tired of it being all about Me, Myself and I.  Help me lay my crap at your feet.  Help me take on your easy yoke.  Help me understand what that even means!  It seem like just words to say.