Working Out My Salvation #3: Life Verses, A Bigger Vocabulary, and Different Perspectives

As she transitioned into adulthood, the phrase Life Verse (or Verses) began to show up in Christian conversation, from the pulpit, or in texts that she'd read. It always made her feel uncomfortable, guilty, or shamed because she couldn't think of one verse she could call a Life Verse. 

Attending a non-denominational Christian private school and an evangelical Southern Baptist Church in her youth had exposed her to thousands of verses that she'd either memorized or was at least very familiar with that could have been potential Life Verses.

And while lots of Bible verses had spoken to her at one time or another, none that she could think of that could be called a "Life Verse", a verse that resonated so much that it guided her mind and actions in any situation. 

She remembers getting cards from friends or family with a scripture reference (or several) written out next to their signature. She always wondered if she were to do that, could she really claim one or more verses as life altering, life guiding, life changing. Or would she just be going through the motions of the Christian version of what we now refer to as virtue signaling - signing off with a popular Bible verse because it's expected from an evangelical perspective (gotta spread that gospel) or proves she is being a good Christian. It felt false for her, so she rarely did it.

She has included Bible verses in some of her old blog posts, verses that spoke something to her situation, verses that helped illustrate, communicate, or support her message. But she never really thought, is this my Life Verse? 

Starting after Austin was born, after her "faith" was derailed, after she began seeking who and what God is in earnest, followed by all the questions: "What is life all about? What the heck is she doing here? What is her purpose? Why was she 'entrusted' with a medically complex child when she could barely keep her spiritual life on track before he came into her life? Should she ever have expectations? Will expectations always lead to disappointment? Does hope exist?"

Well, it dawned on her this week that throughout the past ten years, three verses have repeatedly come to mind and have guided her as she's asked these questions and sought their answers. 

For since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities--his eternal power and divine nature--have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse. Romans 1:20 NIV

Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. Matthew 7:7 NIV

For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7 NKJV

The actual references and even actual phrasing were not always remembered (she looked them up today because that's what good Christians do, they give the "address" and translation of the verse when quoting it so others can find it), but the gist of these three verses have come up again and again as she's made decisions about where to look for answers.

When she hiked or sat in a park or in her backyard, or in more recent years near the lake at the end of the dock, or when she had spiritual discussions with friends or family or observed actions she would consider beyond average, heroic even, the first verse would come to mind.

When she considered what book to read next or what podcast to listen to, which author or speaker might have something to speak to her mind or circumstances at the moment, what denomination or religion or belief system might point to an all encompassing truth, the second two verses would come to mind.

This explains why in the last ten years she has given herself permission to reach out to anything and everything with as open mind as she could for answers: 

• Because the Divine can be seen and understood in anything and everything she observes or experiences
• Because if she is seeking and asking, she can find answers in anything and everything
• Because if she doesn't give into fear, she can discern the truth in anything or everything

Before Austin she did not need to see God. She was continually told about him in church and in her Christian relationships. She accepted or "believed" that he must be true because all these people around her said so. She did not need to open her eyes and see it for herself.

Before Austin she did not need to seek or ask for anything. Again she accepted or believed what everyone else was saying was true. She assumed it was all going to plan.

Before Austin she feared reading or listening to anything outside what was approved by the church which would be primarily the Bible and approved Christian authors. She was taught to fear that she might be exposed to something that would cause her to question her acceptance and belief. The church made her fear that questioning or listening to another point of view might be a sin and undermine her faith in all the unseen things.

However after Austin, when her Christian teaching could not provide in its limited vocabulary or perspective the answers to all the questions, when the rote answer was "God is good...Lean into Christ...Cast all your cares...Have faith...", she was forced to trample fear (over and over she might add) and see what the rest of the "world" might tell her.

She needed a bigger vocabulary and different perspectives. She needed her own observations and experiences. She needed more anything and everything.

And let's just say "God" did not disappoint.

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If you read this far...do you have a Life Verse or Verses (Or let's say Life Quote if you have something that guides you from another source)? And would you mind sharing it with or without explanation in the comments? Curious minds need to know. TIA :)